USS RONALD REAGAN
The USS Ronald Reagan is a Nimitz-class nuclear-powered supercarrier in the service of the United States Navy. The ninth ship of her class, she is named in honor of former President Ronald Reagan, President of the United States from 1981 to 1989. Upon her christening in 2001, she was the first ship to be named for a former president still living at the time.
Seeing the USS Ronald Reagan next to the Arizona Memorial in Pearl Harbor really gives you an idea of her size. She’s ENORMOUS !
Towers 20 stories above the waterline.
1092 feet long — nearly as long as the Empire State Building is tall.
Flight deck covers 4.5 acres.
Her displacement is about 100,000 tons with full complement.
Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactors that can operate for more than 20 years without refueling.
Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years.
Carries over 80 combat aircraft.
Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour in less than 400 feet.
4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds.
2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet and weighing 50 tons.
4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 sq. ft.
Home to about 6,000 Navy personnel.
Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days.
18,150 meals served daily.
Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from sea water daily, enough for 2,000 homes.
Nearly 30,000 light fixtures and 1,325 miles of cable and wiring 1,400 telephones.
14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets.
USS BILL CLINTON
The USS William Jefferson Clinton is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President Bill Clinton ‘for his foresight in military budget cuts’ and his conduct while holding the (formerly dignified) office of President.
The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar powered with a top speed of 5 knots. It boasts an arsenal comprised of one (unarmed) F14 Tomcat or one (unarmed) F18 Hornet aircraft, although they cannot be launched on the 100-ft flight deck.
As a standing order, there are no firearms allowed on board.
This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.
An on-board Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are limitless and, though some may seem hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound very sincere.
In times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada.
USS BARACK OBAMA
Details are vague. But don’t you worry. He has a plan — just like he has a plan to revive the economy!